my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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