walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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