I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize