my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
