This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
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