You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
