No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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