And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
