Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
