is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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