That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
