she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
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