So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
