he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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