She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
