My brain says no but my pants say off.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize
