let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
The police scanner is talking about you again....
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
