its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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