At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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