God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
