can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
