dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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