I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Randomize
