I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
operation have a gay friend backfired
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
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