So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize