She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
