"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Randomize
