Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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