it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
