At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
