I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
