Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
