I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Randomize
