The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize