Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
So vagazzling was a success
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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