Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
