so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I've blown a few things in my day
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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