benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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