I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
