I'm really into asian looking animals
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
