I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
