Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
