I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I'm sobbing to NWA
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
