Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize