you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
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