he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
