Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
a search helicopter?!
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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