why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
