AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize