yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
