This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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